pick

so
that was a crap meeting.
turns out it's not going to get any better at all
it's just going to get worse, again
by her design
(thanks a fucking lot)

all i needed was an ounce of faith in me
to prove that doing what i do isn't a complete waste of time
energy talent love loyalty
my stupid altruistic heart
thought that wasn't too much to ask

so now i have more crossroads
starker than ever
wonder how many times life will smack me round the head with choices if i keep choosing roads that aren't the path towards living
no not even that....not even choosing but dodging the idea completely
staying in apathy and limbo
things are just going to keep elevating until i can't not choose.